Monday, April 28, 2008

Deep Shame...

Greetings, Loyal Reader.

I offer my heartfelt apology that this space has remained empty for so long. Much has happened in my life, and the world, since our last update.

In my life:

I have been promoted at work.

My bank has been successfully swallowed up by a major corporation.

I am planning a two week trip to Denmark to see my girlfriend Pernille and accompany her to the wedding of her best friend, Lone, which happens in less than two weeks.

I dug out my old Sega Genesis and eBay-ed a copy of Shadowrun, the classic RPG that no-one liked except for me.

I have purchased a laptop.

I have purchased Rainbow Six Las Vegas 2, which has consumed a large part of my free time.

My cousin, Randelle Celeste Rutkowski Parker, passed away on April 16th after a long battle with cancer. She is the first of my 21 cousins on my father's side to pass away, and she was far too young to have left her husband and children behind.

We also lost my brother-in-law's grandfather, Paul Utz. Paul is, without doubt or question, the best man I know. He was a soldier in WWII, and he and his wife Kay were madly in love right up until his death. He died suddenly, and the world has suffered a loss for it.

In the world:

The NY Giants won the Superbowl, making my prediction come mostly true (only wrong about the final score).

The Italian Parliament was dismissed.

Roger Clemens proved he is a liar, a cheater, an adulterer, AND an asshole. With a little help from Andy Pettitte and Mindy McCready, of course. Debbie, if you're reading this, my brother is a pitcher, and he's single...

Another school shooting, this time 6 dead and 18 wounded at Northern Illinois University.

They declared adventurer Steve Fossett dead.

They finally found a way to get rid of Fidel Castro; shove his brother into power.

World War III almost broke out when Pakistan shut down You Tube for two hours; record enlistment at Military Recruitment stations reported in those two hours.

Kosovo became it's own country. Good for them. The Beach Boys announced they would remake Kokomo ala Elton John's Candle in the Wind.

Padre Pio makes an Obi Wan Kenobi-like return (well, except he's just been exhumed and is lying under glass, not walking around as a hologram. But you have to agree the resemblance is uncanny).

Brett Farve retired. Again.

Vietnam bans Hamsters. Seriously.

They filled the Internet. SERIOUSLY.

David Patterson replaces Elliot Spitzer amid prostitution scandal. He then admits that he and his wife both had extra marital affairs. Free love, baby!

The dollar reached a new low. So did Brittany Spears.

Oil reached a record high. Like, seventy times.

Earth Hour: March 29th, many major cities turned out their lights from 8 pm to 9 pm. Many people in those cities STILL could not bear to be parted with their internet, thus dooming humanity to a long, slow, roasting death.

Human/Bovine embryo created, lives for three days; Satan, in a weird Don McLean parallel, is indeed "laughing with delight."

The Olympic torch is assaulted amid protests concerning human rights in China. Free Tibet? I thought that meant the house wasn't taking their rake at Caesar's...

Wesley Snipes jailed for tax evasion. He will have to spend the next three years in a country club, just like Tiger Woods.

I will attempt to be more diligent in posting. My trip to Denmark begins on May 7th, marking my first international correspondence.